*jazmynmoon

Dear…anyone who’ll listen,

I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but recently I just can’t focus on anything not my art, my stories, deviantart, video games…anything. And I find myself sitting and doing nothing for long periods of time, or just being on my laptop, not getting anything done. I mean I want to care, but I just can’t seem to. I’m pushing everyone away, with questions and angry tones. I can’t even seem to stay friends with my dad and I’ve been the best of friends with him since I can remember.

I always feel like crying, but there’s nothing wrong with my life. I mean I could complain, and I often do, but there are so many more people who have it worse. It’s like I’d rather be sad than numb. But I don’t even have that anymore.

I hate my life but I have no reason to.

I really wish I could just focus on my art, or my writing but even on my free time, I can’t.

I want so much, and I get a lot. But when I get what I want I just want more, and I can’t seem to remember what I’ve gotten so I feel like I have nothing.

I love doing things but once something’s over I don’t remember what happened except for a vague feeling about it, and a few random details.

I know everything I do right now is wrong, but I really don’t know how to fix it, even though people tell me… if there’s anyone I’ve hurt because I’m so distant I dearly sorry and I hope that they can forgive me, when I fix myself.

With a numb apology,
Jazmyn

P.S. If you see me staring like I don’t care, I probably do but just don’t know how to show it. I should but I don’t, I’m sorry, I soo sorry.



my clubs